Just One More Chance

Its always disturbing when I hear someone has taken their own life. Even if I never met them, I find myself wishing that I had and maybe I could have talked to them in some way to relieve the pain they must have been going through. Years ago I had a friend that I had met in college. We had run around together during the year I was at UT and met up a few times in later years. I lost touch with him while I was in the Navy. I gave up when he didn't respond to notes I sent him. Many years later, when I came across his old home phone number, I called, and was informed by his mother that he had been gay, had gotten AIDs and had killed himself. I was totally shocked at what had happened and equally shocked that I had not figured out he was gay. I blamed that on the fact that I was young and totally naive A few days ago I found out that a man that worked for us last year for several weeks , had taken his own life. He was a true craftsman with cement and plaster. I had worked along side him last year, mostly bringing him supplies and carrying off the old concrete and plaster that he had removed. We had talked a lot while he was working and I had figured out that he was fairly beat down by life. He hadn't had steady work for years and when he did find some, had to work for less than he had many years before. This was a product of the poor economy and the flood of immigrants that had driven down the value of his work. The last time I saw him was the first week we got here this year. I was at a store that sells concrete products and I was looking for a concrete cover. There was a group of men waiting for service and I had not noticed him in the group. He saw me and called out my name and came over to talk to me. He asked if I had any work for him as he only had a few more days of work on his currant project. We really hadn't planned on doing any repairs this year. We did have just a few little things that he could have taken care of in a day or so. I was thinking of calling him the day I heard he was no more. I wish I had had the chance to talk to him again. Maybe I could have made a difference.